[SaintArthur]

zombies-would-most-likely-wipe-out-humanity-if-they-really-existed

Sounds like a plug for World War Z ( book and movie ) to me. Although, having read the book, I am not at all against it.
I'm currently trying to get an actual copy of the report, I think it would make good reading. Edit: Here it is

-

Civilisation would most likely be finished in the event of a zombie outbreak, claim Canadian mathematicians who have calculated the possible devastation caused by an attack by the fictional monsters.

Using models developed to calculate the effects of more plausible pandemics, the team from the University of Ottawa have discovered that unless man struck back quickly and aggressively then they would be doomed.

The scientific paper, which is published in a book 'Infectious Diseases Modelling Research Progress', looks at an attack by the undead creatures, who infect the living with a bite.

In their study, titled 'When Zombies Attack!', the researchers picked “classic” slow-moving zombies such as those in Dawn of the Dead as models and divided humanity into three: the living, zombies and the “removed” – zombies who had been killed by decapitation.

They concluded there was no point trying to cure those infected or live with them - the best thing was to destroy them as quickly as possible.

“A zombie outbreak is likely to lead to the collapse of civilisation, unless it is dealt with quickly,” they write in the book

“While aggressive quarantine may contain the epidemic, or a cure may lead to coexistence of humans and zombies, the most effective way to contain the rise of the undead is to hit hard and hit often.

“As seen in the movies, it is imperative that zombies are dealt with quickly, or else we are all in a great deal of trouble.”

Joe Imad, the study's co-author, said: “If you look at it in a more realistic way, zombies are about the same as any other major infectious disease, they get out and we try to eliminate them.

“Modelling zombies would be the same as modelling swine flu, with some differences for sure, but it is much more interesting to read.”

© Telegraph.co.uk

This post has been edited by SaintArthur: 19 September 2009 - 04:56 PM

[bobisme25]

Owning and have read the"zombie surival guide" by garth brooks abd beeing an "expert" on the subject, i offer up this answer:

yes, we would survive.

Would it be the same as it is now? no.

Why? simply because there are freaks like me (and the people who did the study), who think of almost nothing besides what would happen if the dead walked the earth.

the world would deteriate into chaos, out of that chaos would emerge impenitrable fortraces with mediavel-time technoledgy. Again it would become survival of the fitest, with a loosely definition for fitest (seeing as most of the experts on the suject are by no means "fit"). most of humanity would join the stumbling army, why the few who survived would eather run out of supplies or get killed. while the survivors would fortifie, plant crops, and become beacons of life in the dead world.

[Glix]

the world would deteriate into chaos, out of that chaos would emerge impenitrable fortraces with mediavel-time technoledgy. Again it would become survival of the fitest, with a loosely definition for fitest (seeing as most of the experts on the suject are by no means "fit"). most of humanity would join the stumbling army, why the few who survived would eather run out of supplies or get killed. while the survivors would fortifie, plant crops, and become beacons of life in the dead world.

In the movies they just barricade the doors at the local Store.. Medieval technology is fine and all, but look for me on a beanbag in Tesco watching all of the TV's on the wall at once with a glass of chocolate milk

[Katesickle]

Cracked.com has a list of 5 Scientific Reasons the Zombie Apocalypse Could Actually Happen. The end is near, folks.

[The Illusionist]

Owning and have read the"zombie surival guide" by garth brooks abd beeing an "expert" on the subject, i offer up this answer:

yes, we would survive.

"The Zombie Survival Guide" was written by MAX Brooks, Mister Expert, sir. Just thought I'd mention that....

[DollMaestro]

A thought just came to me...

What if we invent a perpetual flying machine, or a GIANT magic carpet?

Zombies can't fly. Plus we can gun them down from above.

This post has been edited by DollMaestro: 20 September 2009 - 04:32 PM

[The Illusionist]

Then you'd be trapped up in the airwith all of your closest friends and family - or potentially a whole lot of strangers - any of whom might be infected. Any one of them, at any time, could turn, and you'd be stuck up there waiting for your turn to come while sweet, safe Earth is hundreds of feet below...

That or you'd starve to death. Pretty hard to even find 5 years' worth of food and water for one person, let alone store enough several without a way of growing some yourself.

You'd be better off on a big boat, like a cruise ship. Lots of room to store provisions plenty of equipment for distiling water and catching food, and as zombis can't swim you'd be perfectly safe unless onegot sucked into an engine or something. And even then, youd still have to quarentine EVERYONE on board to make sure they weren't going to bite you in the ass as soon as you turn your back on them.....

~The Illusionist
"Not quite memorized the ZSG...
....But I'm getting closer everyday."

[Glix]

Again.. you'd be safest in a big superstore
plenty of food, clothes, hygeine stuff, and generally only 2-3 entrances one of which is alarmed & deadlocked and the other can be shut and locked! Tesco \o/

[Toreshi]

I'm amused that this topic popped up just after I decided to use my zombie apocalypse idea for NaNoWriMo09. lol

That said, if rise-from-the-grave zombies ever attacked, J and I would be some of the first to go, as we recently moved just up the road from a graveyard. @_@

[The Illusionist]

A graveyard would actually be a pretty safe place to go.

No ordinary human could realistically smash open a casket from the inside and then dig, bare handed, 6feet up to the surface even if the need for air wasn't a problem. Anything buried underground would stay there (dare I even bother the gardens for those who have cremated? ) and apart form that, who else would be around to attract the zombies?

They go for the biggest sources of meat. Graveyards are virtually deserted, so if you hole up nice and quiet in the chapel you're going to be fairly safe until you need to forage for resources.

...Which in turn....

Again.. you'd be safest in a big superstore tongue.gif
plenty of food, clothes, hygeine stuff, and generally only 2-3 entrances one of which is alarmed & deadlocked and the other can be shut and locked! Tesco \o/

...Makes a Supermarket a REALLY bad idea. Yes you'd have food, but it's the first place people will go during a panic. If they don't wreck the place in a mad spree of looting for food and tools, there's going to be bright lights, the sound of breaking glass and a large mass of people all in one place with only narrow dorrways to escape through. It's nothing more than a dinner-bell ringing, to the Undead....

[Sable]

Ok, so it would depend on the type of zombies (or infected, as zombie experts refer to them).

If it was the slow moving stumbling sort, I'm sure we'd be fine. The most we'd need would be a baseball bat, cricket bat, hockey stick, etc (Unless they swarmed us, but seriously, if you were outflanked by a slow arse 1970's zombie, you probably don't need to worry about them eating your brain.)

If the zombies are reminiscant of Dawn of the Dead or the infected version from 28 Days Later, we are so much more fucked. Firearms would be a very large help. Or getting to a safe house and hiding until the zombies starve to death (and this may not even happen!)

Graveyards would either be the safest place or the worst, depending on how the zombie plague started.


*Having reread my post, I need to go get a gun.

[The Unbalanced Mind]

It all depends on how the zombie apocalypse spreads and how capable each zombie is. Classical slow moving zombie that spreads through bite, we're A ok. Airborne, a few people will survive. Fast moving zombies like in Left 4 Dead, unless you are a really skilled group or immune to a zombie's bite then you could end up joining the ranks of the dead. As for individual survival, I have spent years preparing for this and other post-apocalyptic events, it all depends on where you are, what you do the first few days of infection, and how the infection spreads.

If a zombie invasion were to happen here, even though we do not have a zombie invasion plan despite myself begging the military to set one up that doesn't involve nuking us unless there is no other hope, it wouldn't be that hard to survive the initial infection, assuming that's where it starts, unless more zombies were shipped in from somewhere. However if you're in a major city, Chicago, Boston, New York, you'd probably have a really hard time surviving.

If a zombie attack were to happen though you'd want to avoid heavily populated areas until after the initial rush of panicking people, I assure you those supplies will be there for a couple of weeks, and make sure you have a plan ahead of time, where to go, what to do, and what type of people in your town you should avoid.

[sockPuppet]

Sounds like a plug for World War Z ( book and movie ) to me.

Oh god, they're not making a movie based on this piece of ****, are they?

World War Z is quite possibly the worst piece of literature ever written on the subject of zombocalypse™. From the horrifyingly cheesy stereotypes that ooze out of the global overview, to the utter lack of drama in any of the testimonials, reading it was a complete waste of time. Which is a shame, because I actually liked the Survival Guide quite a bit.

As to whether or not humanity would survive... I'm gonna go with "no". At least if survival implies that the Earth is reclaimed and repopulated, not just that scattered groups eke out a living in supermarkets and prisons around the world...

[chetmo]

A few things:

• zombies are usually a great metaphor for a plethora of problems. Specifically, how many simple problems can overwhelm you. Zombies get you with numbers..
• Some zombie movies, the zombies pass the infection. Others, everyone is already infected with the Zombie disease (You die, you come back), and their bite is just one of many ways you can die.
• Fixed locations are bad, because the zombies have numbers and time. You always need an escape route. Staying put too long just reduces your options.
• Hardest shot in the world for a marksman is shooting someone in the head. The head bobs around too much, like a chicken running in the yard. An inexperienced shooter will have to get real close to kill a zombie. Axes and clubs are better, but more bloody. Chance of being infected from the splatter.
• Food: Canned goods will last about five years. Then, you have to get something fresh. You need to find a real secure place to start a garden. I suggest a prison with thick walls (The Walking Dead comic series).
• Are the zombies rotting? Eventually, they should rot away. Extreme cold weather should freeze them solid (zombies don't generate body heat). What about insects eating dead, infected tissue?
• Scary thought: What if animals get 'zombified' too? Can you imagine the problems a horde of zombie mice or rats could do? Zombie fish? Zombie bats?

[The Unbalanced Mind]

I like this guy. But I have a few things to add but I don't know how to add dots so I'll use *

*Fixed locations are bad but you still need to start a garden so might I suggest taking time when you get a chance to make an armored bus or mobile home, hoping more people know how to weld then I think.

*Yeah, shooting someone in the head is hard, thus why shotguns are the recommended firearm. As for the blood splattering from the zombies, you should be fine unless it hits an open sore or any open orifice so hygiene, though most likely going to be hard to maintain, is a must.

*Resident Evil had animals with similar DNA, dogs, rats, birds, pigs, primates, and other creatures zombified too. If the disease does manage to cross over those small jumps in DNA difference, like bird flu, swine flu, aids, and so on, then it would really make things nearly impossible to survive. However I wouldn't be to worried about it infecting fish, deer, bears, and a whole slew of the animal kingdom because even if it did manage to make its way to them it would likely be a completely new disease by then that wouldn't harm humans.

[Waycos]

Blood splatter isn't as big an issue considering there is no blood pressure, AND most of the blood will have dried up long ago. Only fresh zombies would have any real fluid to worry about.

As for weapons, samurai sword should be the obvious weapon of choice. Long, sharp, you don't have ammo issues and it's not as heavy as a bat or (sledge)hammer so you wont tire out as easily.

[Malone]

As far as firearms are concerned, the Shotgun would probably be the best gun to have on hand for a zombie attack:

- Tons of ammo: Shotgun's can use a variety of different shell sizes, and as far as finding ammo is concerned you can find Shotgun Shells at any store that sells any form of ammunition, if they carry ammo...they carry shotgun shells.

- Handling: It does not take an expert to use a Shotgun, most of them have a single bead at the end of the barrel and no actual aiming is required in a time of need. Shotguns can be used quiet easily as a 'point and shoot' type gun, and depending on the load of the ammo, it can be used from 0 - 50 yards effectively. Most shotguns can also carry up to 8 rounds in the magazine, so this ia 8 less rounds you need to carry on your person.

- Maintenance: As far as guns are concerned Shotguns have very little moving parts, and require very little maintenance. The gun does not have to be dismantled for a quick cleaning, and it can be cleaned with anything on hand. The procedure for cleaning the barrel can be done with a small piece of cloth and a coat hanger, or generally any long piece of material that can be put through the barrel.

Depending on the Shotgun itself you can get a range from single shot, to fully automatic drug magazine, all depends what you have access too. You can also carry multiple shotguns of various sizes on you at any given time, and they all use the same ammunition.

...and thats what I have to contribute to this.

Side note - Depending on the load a Shotgun can also be used to make an accurate headshot up to 45 yards, just ask any Wild Turkey hunter, they will tell you A turkey's head is MUCH smaller then a human head, so if it can be hit, then so can a zombie.

[J_A_X]

As for weapons, samurai sword should be the obvious weapon of choice. Long, sharp, you don't have ammo issues and it's not as heavy as a bat or (sledge)hammer so you wont tire out as easily.

Well, a katana isn't all that long (around 40"), so you still have to be quite close range to them, which puts you in danger zone for scratches/bites. Also, my hand forged katana weighs about 15lbs. I've practised many nights with it, and after about an hour or so, my arm/wrist is shot.

If I were to have a bladed weapon, it would be a Qiang. Keep the zombies at bay while chopping them up.

[Lush]

Ya, Zombieland rules, they work: (excerpt from http://www.horror-mo...ror_16631.html)

Rule 1: Cardio: How many fat people do you see at the end of the world when its zombies doing the ending?

Rule 2: Beware of Bathrooms: Really not just bathrooms any good apocalyptic zombie survivor should know better then going into a bathroom, small closet or any other small room with only one way in or out. Only thing stupider to go into then a bathroom is a movie theater. Lots of places to run around before you get eaten.

Rule 3: Seatbelts: Its a safe bet unless your a complete dumb dumb ( see rule #7 ) your not going to be hoofing it on foot in the event of a zombie outbreak. So when travelling on four wheels wear your seat belt. Nothing worse then finding yourself ejected out of your car into the loving and oh so hungry arms of zombies.

Rule 4: Doubletap: Carrying a gun is a great idea but it should never be your primary weapon. When you do end up using it for that last minute 'oh poop' moment remember to double tap. Its an emergency and thats why your using it and not your cricket bat so why skimp? One bullet more in the head will go a long way to ensuring your survival.

Rule 5: No Attachments: This is a tough one but you can not have attachments. If you got kids or a wife your less likely to survive then the gal or guy who has no attachments and nothing slowing him or her down. Or worse yet making bonehead decisions like 'going back into the room'

Rule 6: Travel in a Group: The best way to increase your odds of survival when travelling in a zombie outbreak is to make sure your a traveling buffet. Going it alone gives the zombies no choices but to eat you. Going it with the old man with the limp, the little kid who cant run and the middle aged woman with the plastic leg gives the zombies more options and you better odds you can run away faster then they can.

Rule 7: Keep the Dumb Dumbs Close at Hand: One of the most sure fire ways of making sure you survive is keeping the less intelligent as close at hand as possible. When you find somebody who asks you 'Whats going on? What Happened? Those are the ones you want with you. That way when the zombies come they are likely to stupid to realize its not Amway calling and run.

Rule 8: Kill with Efficiency: Its not about pretty its about efficiency. Alot of folks run for the gun cabinet where as the truly savvy go looking for the most blunt and effective way to destroy the brain. That can be anything from a baseball bat... to a toilet lid! Kill with Efficiency... dont use weapons that need something to work and use weapons you can swing over and over and over again. You dont tend to run into 1 zombie at a time.

Rule 9: Guns Are for Hunting, Not for Zombie Killing: This one is simple. Guns need bullets. When your running who has time to stop for bullets? Keeping a shotgun with buckshot on hand is important but only when your pinned in and need a quick getaway. Its not a proper means for killing zombies as they run out of ammo and need reloading. Remember a Cricket Bat, or Toilet Lid do not need loading!

Rule 10: Be Quiet: Its the end of the world as you know it so try to avoid squeeling like a 4th grade school girl and perhaps invest in some good sneakers. Nobody said you have to kill all the zombies and there is certainly no shame in sneaking around and surviving versus tearing around like a madman and ending up being an undead happy meal.

Rule 15: Know Your Way out! Nothing worse then a poorly planned escape. If your going to be a hero its always a good idea to plan ahead and as the rule states.. know your way out!

Rule 17: Don't Be a Hero: The hot chick who was totally gonna give you some is not worth becoming the undead. So when the going gets rough and the hot chick is about to get undead... its time to flee. No making a stand no ending up a brave zombie. Better to be a chicken liver live guy.

Rule 18: Limber Up: When either fighting a zombie or running from zombies its not a great time to be pulling a muscle or throwing your back out. So limbering up is kind of a must. Stretch it out a little.. it may save your life.

Rule 19: Blend in: Much as Shaun did in Shaun of the Dead its important to blend in. Whens the last time you saw a zombie try to eat another zombie? not easily done but with the right odor and smearing of goo on your face it can happen.

[Waycos]

If I were to have a bladed weapon, it would be a Qiang. Keep the zombies at bay while chopping them up.

Leave it to Jax to pick a pole weapon.