Sign In
Register
Help
Car Driving
Stop at green lights
pass cars and then drive really slowly
At traffic lights, eye the person in the next car suspiciously. With a look of fear, lock your door.
Honk frequently without motivation
Wave at people often. If they wave back, offer a dirty look and an obscene gesture.
Let pedestrians know who's boss.
Restart your car at every stop light.
Hang numerous air-fresheners on the rear-view mirror. Talk to them, stroking them lovingly.
Have some passengers in the back who are having wild and noisy sex.
Stop and smell the roses.
---
Sex Phrases
What is that?
Is it in?
You're kidding, right?
(Phone rings) Hello? Oh, nothing much, you?
Do I have to pay for this?
Uh... you look better in the dark.
You have the same bra type my mum does (Worse if the girl says this).
I hope you don't expect a raise for this.
Did I tell you I have herpes?
Now we must get married.
Are you trying to be funny?
Haven't you ever done this before?
Do you know what some female spiders do after sex?
But you just started!
Don't touch that!
I think ym dad is listening at the door.
Smile for the camera, honey.
Get your hand out of there.
I knew you wore a padded bra.
Hold on, let me change the channel.
Stop moaning, you sound stupid.
I'm sorry, I wasn't listening.
It's okay honey, I can imagine it's bigger.
God I wish you were a real woman.
By the way, when I drove over here I ran over your dog.
Oh Susan, Susan... I mean Donna!
Is it okay if after this, I never see you again.
Did I forget to tell you I got worms from my cat?
Don't make that face at me!
Don't squirm, you'll spill my beer.
Page 1 of 1
- You cannot start a new topic
Add Reply
Fun things to do while driving With bonus list - bad things to say during sex
#1
dmh3000 
- Group: Members
- Posts: 368
- Joined: 14-January 08
Posted 09 January 2009 - 05:13 AM
Living With Insanity - We have nudist girls and stuff.
"Would you jack off a pig for $100,000?"
"I'll do it for fifty. Twenty if the pig returns the favour."
LICD #I have no clue
"Would you jack off a pig for $100,000?"
"I'll do it for fifty. Twenty if the pig returns the favour."
LICD #I have no clue
Back to top
MultiQuote
#2
FutbolDude21586
- The Resident Nudist and Crazy, Hugging Yeti
- Group: Members
- Posts: 11,100
- Joined: 20-March 04
- Gender:Male
- Location:Gainesville, FL, USA
- Interests:Video games, music, surfing teh intranets, all things soccer/futbol, eating...
Posted 09 January 2009 - 02:24 PM
...Did I tell you I have AIDs/HIV?
" Jaenne: Watch out for FBD.. he's worse than a squirrel with rabies some days. "
" [02:33] <Maelgwyn> Awareness comes and goes. Insanity is forever "
" dreamchaser: *tries Jim* hmmmm... needs more onions... =P
" Jim: ima popsickle!
dreamchaser: *sucks on Jim* ;) "
" 'No man is an island, entire of iteself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main. Any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind.' -John Donne, Meditation XVII "
" Mismin: *cuddles teh yeti* "
" DIV-The real meaning behind men's names...Jim - sweet, has fantasies of love and affection but wanks too much. "
" [02:33] <Maelgwyn> Awareness comes and goes. Insanity is forever "
" dreamchaser: *tries Jim* hmmmm... needs more onions... =P
" Jim: ima popsickle!
dreamchaser: *sucks on Jim* ;) "
" 'No man is an island, entire of iteself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main. Any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind.' -John Donne, Meditation XVII "
" Mismin: *cuddles teh yeti* "
" DIV-The real meaning behind men's names...Jim - sweet, has fantasies of love and affection but wanks too much. "
QUOTE (Toreshi @ Apr 8 2009, 02:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I must be channeling FBD today...my head is KILLING me. I feel like there's a creature in my brain trying to burst out through the front of my skull. @_@
#3
Solar
- Hewwo Shaggy!
-
- Group: Moderators
- Posts: 7,292
- Joined: 13-October 05
- Gender:Male
- Location:Yuma, Arizona, USA
- Interests:In no particular order: I like funny books, animation, video games, my fiance, dancing, traveling, wine tasting, beer tasting.. general alky snob, running my businesses, running other peoples businesses, reading, flirting, helping out when I can and being just a normal guy...
Posted 09 January 2009 - 02:50 PM
Your Dad told me you were really good at this...
#4
Dracowrath
- Group: Members
- Posts: 610
- Joined: 14-December 08
- Gender:Male
- Location:Somewhere in southwestern ohio.
Posted 09 February 2009 - 03:51 AM
Dont worry, those bumps are just extra skin, I'm fine.
Dont worry, those bumps are just extra skin, I'm fine.
Dont worry, those bumps are just extra skin, I'm fine.
I really dont get NASCAR. Anyone who can sit and watch a bunch of guys drive in circles for hours on end is beyond me - Myself
#5
saffer's
- Group: Members
- Posts: 59
- Joined: 26-March 09
- Gender:Female
- Location:planet ninja! ^_^
- Interests:i like reading, eating, watching TV, and reading website comics but don't like waiting for the next comic to come out.
Posted 02 April 2009 - 04:02 AM
1. But everybody looks funny naked!
2. You woke me up for that?
3. Did I mention the video camera?
4. On second thought, let's turn off the lights.
5. And to think- I was really trying to pick up your friend!
2. You woke me up for that?
3. Did I mention the video camera?
4. On second thought, let's turn off the lights.
5. And to think- I was really trying to pick up your friend!
Dont test me!!... I can kill you with two fingers!!
() ()
( ' - ') BUNNY!!! he will rule the world!
() ()
( ' - ') BUNNY!!! he will rule the world!
#6
simrnz
- Group: Members
- Posts: 3
- Joined: 15-May 09
Posted 16 May 2009 - 01:33 AM
The best fun thing I do while I drive alone is to make naughty emotions to people around and it's real fun if you do this to kids and young girls. You'll have lots of fun when they'll look back to you with confused faces. You can have more fun looking at (usually forbidden palces) i.e. legs and they'll be embrassed 
#7
Arch
- Group: Members
- Posts: 166
- Joined: 11-August 08
Posted 23 May 2009 - 01:00 AM
QUOTE (simrnz @ May 15 2009, 11:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The best fun thing I do while I drive alone is to make naughty emotions to people around and it's real fun if you do this to kids and young girls. You'll have lots of fun when they'll look back to you with confused faces. You can have more fun looking at (usually forbidden palces) i.e. legs and they'll be embrassed
#9
Hailsky
- Group: Members
- Posts: 648
- Joined: 26-February 08
- Location:Canada
- Interests:I love movies, I don't watch much tv anymore except for DEXTER! I am huge fan of that guy. I'm learning guitar (self taught) and it's going well. I like all kinds of music and mostly I don't listen to the radio, I like to look for bands that are more underground *sorry if that sounds cliche*. That's not to say there isn't some good entertainment out there, just... well this is what I'm listening to lately:<br /><br />City & Colour<br />Coheed and Cambria<br />Dustin Kensrue<br />Emarosa<br />Flight of the Conchords<br />Fleet Foxes<br />Imogen Heap<br />Isles and Glaciers<br />Lights<br />Missy Higgins<br />Owl City<br />Paramore<br />Say Anything<br />Sufjan Stevens<br />The Reason<br />Ubiquitous Synergy Seeker<br />You, Me, and Everyone We Know<br /><br />There are a lot more, but not enough room so I'll stick with those for now. I'm pretty sure they all have myspace accounts if you want to take a look.
Posted 04 June 2009 - 08:40 PM
i would be pissed at most of the stuff in the "fun things to do while driving" if anyone did them.
A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular
--Adlai Stevenson
--Adlai Stevenson
'In this world... you must be oh, so smart or oh, so pleasant.' Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. - Elwood P. Dowd
#10
smarmyprince
- I blame the Brain Spiders.
- Group: Members
- Posts: 964
- Joined: 17-September 05
- Gender:Male
- Location:Urbana, IL
- Interests:Theatre, wordplay, music.
Posted 04 June 2009 - 08:57 PM
QUOTE (Lopt @ Jun 3 2009, 08:44 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Another addition to your 'sex list'.
'Happy Birthday, Grandma!'
'Happy Birthday, Grandma!'
I'm glad I'm not the only one who still reads QC.
I got syphilis in Scrabble for 71 pts.
Everything is better as a slushie.
Everything is better as a slushie.
#11
Hebrew
- Group: Members
- Posts: 168
- Joined: 07-February 06
- Gender:Male
- Location:My house...
Posted 06 July 2009 - 11:56 AM
Some bad ones during or after sex...
(after) Dad, that was amazing...
(during the climax) WHO'S YOUR DADDY!
(reply) YOU ARE!
The rest from now on are during.
Whoops, sorry, wrong hole.
Okay, now you do me.
Wait, why are you lubing up your finger?
Y'know, I haven't done this since the family reunion!
Wow, you're almost as good as your sister!
Better not film this... Don't want them to take away my hard drive.
What's your name again?
OH GRANDMA!
(after) Dad, that was amazing...
(during the climax) WHO'S YOUR DADDY!
(reply) YOU ARE!
The rest from now on are during.
Whoops, sorry, wrong hole.
Okay, now you do me.
Wait, why are you lubing up your finger?
Y'know, I haven't done this since the family reunion!
Wow, you're almost as good as your sister!
Better not film this... Don't want them to take away my hard drive.
What's your name again?
OH GRANDMA!
So, I have all this empty space, and nothing to put in it... Might as well write something interesting.
...
I got nothin'.
...
I got nothin'.
Page 1 of 1
- You cannot start a new topic
- Add Reply
